Dear Mr Ferguson,

I am very happy that the reds are back on top of the table despite the recent poor run of form. I am also delighted that we are in the semis of The Champions League.  The League Cup and World Club Cup and Charity Shield trophies were nice too.

But I can’t tell you how sad the ignomious end to the FA Cup run made me.

I understand that you really, really want to win the Premiership and the Champions League. I get that. I do too.

And I understand that you need to rest players at the end of a long hard season. But still I am sad.

The FA Cup has a special place in my heart. For the 76 cup, I dressed up all of my cuddly toys in red - Bugs as a player and Uncle Ted as a fan - and put them in my window. I treasure the heartache of that defeat as much as the joy when we beat Liverpool in 77. I still remember looking forward to school so i could rub Gavin Mantel’s nose in  it.

And so, I think it was disrespectful to field a team of reserves in an FA Cup semi-final. At Wembley Stadium no less!

It was disrespectful to Wembley Stadium, to the oldest competition in Football and, especially, to my memories.

Could you not have played a decent playmaker? Scholes was fit. And Giggs. Even Nani or Carrick!

Why did you stay in the competition so long, only to throw it away in such an easy game against such weak opposition? It was just one more game! One goal and we would have been in the final! You may think 11 wins is enough, but I, for one, would have been overjoyed with one more.

Mr Ferguson, I am disappointed in you.

The Ragged Clown

Who knew that this :

Would become this:

?

Can anyone in the first picture pick me out from the second? Vice versa?

I remember how excited I was the first time time I saw Ronaldo (Ronaldo of the magic feet) in a red shirt.

I think I was even more excited when I saw our new, 18 year old right back, Rafael.

So imagine how excited I was when I saw our new left back, Raphael’s twin brother, Fabio.

They are really rather good.

I shall try this tomorrow morning at my pick-up game.

Rob Smyth, in The Guardian, blames Lampard and Gerrard for compromising England’s one world-class attacking talent. Scientists claim that Consciousness is the hard problem, but the Lampard and Gerrard problem is hard too.

If we could find a decent goalkeeper and a striker who is over 5ft 2in who does not have clown feet, England would be marvellous. But we have to acknowledge that Lampard and Gerrard cannot play together, despite what Borat says.

I read of Frank Lampard that he cannot play with Gerrard. Why not? Is not allowed? Is against your law? In my country, is OK for two men to play with each other. We do all the time. Is nice.

Gotta drop Lampard and play the world’s greatest scouser behind the even greater scouser, Rooney.

If I am not mistaken, the best football team in the world is now sponsored by the US Government.

I had a late game last night and, as usual after a late game - especially when my goal was so spectacular - I didn’t get to sleep until very very late.

Before I went to sleep though, I googled for Portland English Premiership soccer tv. Among the hits was a forum post entitled “Where can I watch English Premier League football in Portland?” and the most popular answer was Kells Irish Pub at Second and Ash right next to the Burnside Bridge.

I set my alarm for 6:30 AM, went to sleep, woke up four hours later, put on my Red Devils shirt and set off to watch the thrilling climax to ManU’s season.

Central Portland has this neat feature where all the East/West streets are numbered from 1 to N (1 is next to the river) and all the North/South streets are in alphabetical order. I was headed for some Irish pub at 2nd and something beginning with A which, in my blurry mind, was just over the bridge.

I arrived at 2nd/Ash at 7:03 just after the kick off in a very inhospitable looking area. Not at all the kind of place where I would put a pub. In fact, not at all where anyone would put a pub. I had already missed the kick off so drove around frantically looking for an Irish pub and eventually got out of the car to search frantically on foot.

I found two very, very drunk guys getting out of a pickup and heading for a bar. I asked them if there was an Irish Pub in the area and the put their arms around me and said no but, although they liked Irish music, I should join them in this pub because the beer was better. I thanked them for the offer and got back in my car and drove around frantically some more.

I gave up and headed for The Pearl in search of any pub that might be showing it. No luck there either so I went home. By now, I was incredibly sleepy and planned to just get back in bed but my laptop was still open and I took one last look at the map that I had left open the night before. It was the other Second and Ash and I could still catch the second half of the game!

And what a second half it was!

The Kells is an excellent pub for watching sports and was absolutely packed. One half was a sea of red watching the ManU v Wigan game, the other half a sea of blue watching the Chelsea v Bolton game with everyone drinking Guinness (including me).

Giggs’s goal was sublime - what a way to celebrate equaling Bobby Charlton’s record of 758 appearances for ManU - and the whole red end of the pub was up on its feet.

I am sooooo glad, I didn’t get back in bed.