Ragged Clown

It's just a shadow you're seeing that he's chasing…


The Intruder


It’s 3am at the Hotel Fifty. Only the rumble of the train and the roar of the traffic disturbs the silence of the over-active air-conditioner. Our hero is sleeping softly.

*door creaks*

*door slams*

Mysterious Stranger: Fuck! What is this shit??!

Our hero awakes.  Startled by the noise and the stranger in his room, he sits bolt upright in his bed.

*stranger disrobes*

Our Hero:  Who the fuck are you?

Stranger: Who the fuck are YOU?

Our hero gets out of bed wearing his usual sleeping attire, which is to say: nothing.

Our Hero: Get the fuck out of my room!
*Stranger jabs finger at our hero’s naked chest*
Stranger: No! YOU get the fuck out of MY room!

Our hero and the stranger are now eyeball to eyeball. It is evident that the stranger is very, very drunk.

Our Hero: You need to leave, RIGHT NOW!

Stranger: No! YOU need to leave right now!

Dialog continues in this vein for several minutes before….

Stranger: Fuck this! I am going to bed!

Stranger gets in Our Hero’s bed.

Our hero calls the front desk…

Our Hero (agitated): There is an intruder in my room.

Voice on Phone: There is an intruder in your Room? How did he get in?

Our Hero: I don’t know. He just showed up.

Voice on Phone: I’ll be right there.

*our Hero puts on some shorts*

*time passes*

*knock on door*

*our hero indicates strange man in his bed*

Hotel Dude: You need to leave! Right now!
Stranger in Bed: No! he needs to leave! right now!

*Stranger notices pile of our Hero’s dirty laundry*
*Stranger throws laundry at our hero*

Stranger: get your fucking shit out of my room!

Hotel Dude: I’m calling the police.

* time passes*
* stranger leaves*

Police: do you want to press charges
Our hero: I just want to sleep.

Hotel dude: make sure you put the bar thing on your door.
Our hero: ya,thanks. I will.


9 responses to The Intruder

georgina July 29, 2010

I LOL’d sooo sooo much!! It’s funny now, but am I glad I wasn’t with you!! I like the hero mentioned…he seems like a cool dude!

georgina July 29, 2010

It’s still funny!!! hahahaha

georgina July 29, 2010

It’s funny again;)

Dianne July 30, 2010

If nothing else, you really know how to tell a story! Thanks for the few minutes of entertainment.

Kevin Lawrence August 2, 2010

I received a Customer Sat survey from the hotel today. I just sent them a link to my blog. I wonder if they’ll read it.

[Hello Customer Sat team of the Hotel Fifty!]

Dorienne August 5, 2010

Wow, I loved every word of it. :o)

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