The Tortured Slumber of Brave Ulysses
The Sirens:[Singing, soothing] Sleep, brave Ulysses! Sleep! Let us soothe your sinews with our sensuous songs of slumber!
Scylla: [LOUD!] *LOUD CLICK* I WHOOSH YOU INTO WAKEFULNESS! NO SLEEP FOR YOU! MY INFERNAL NOISE BRINGS FIRE FROM THE VERY DEPTHS OF HELL *LOUD CLICK* [subsides. Exit stage left. LOUDLY!]
The Sirens: [Sensuous, enchanting] Close your eyes, weary traveller! Dreams we have for you. Or, if not dreams then reverie for none shall dream while watching waiting.
Charybdis: [Creeping, oozing] My icy fingertips drag you back from slumber. Can such cold exist? Know it well, foolish mortal for I bring it unto thee!
Scylla :[SHOUTING] *LOUD CLICK* BEGONE CHARYBDIS! YOU WILL NOT WAKE HIM WITH YOUR COLD HARD SILENCE FOR I WILL WAKE HIM WITH MY FIRES! AND MY WHOOSHING! I WILL *LOUD CLICK!!* [falls silent]
The Sirens: [weird harmonies] Such dreams, such dreams you will not know if you sleep and dream of wakefulness or wish for sleep’s gentle release.Â Remember, ye that teacher of old and of those days when the seven seas ye rode and ships tall sailed and soft! wailed the sunsets of your youth. I will sing of them to ye…
SCYLLA: [SHOUTING!] *LOUD CLICK! IT IS NOT YET MY TURN BUT STILL I CLICK AND WHOOSH MY HOTNESS. NO SLEEP FOR YOU *LOUD CLICK*
Charybdis: My turn it is and cold I bring, such cold ye have not known or yet imagined *LOUD CLICK* I HAVE THEE FOOLED FOR I AM NOT CHARYBDIS WITH HIS ICY DAGGERS! I AM SCYLLA WITH MY WHOOSING AND MY INFERNO AND MY INFERNAL WHOOSHING AND MY CLICKING *CLICK AND WHOOSH!*.
Narrator: What new demon is this! Avert your eyes, Brave Ulysses! For it is 12:30 AM You have slept for hours yet not slept at all and many hours yet remain in your journey through your twilight of neither sleep nor proper waking.
The Sirens: [singing soothing songs] I have a dream for thee! Remember the girl from the days of thy coming of age? She was no girl! She is your bank manager and your loan is denied! For why would you approach me for a loan unrobed!? I mock thee and cast thee out into the streets where you are lost and searching..search for what??… ye have forgotten..and search ye must..and search…for wakefulness or sleep…why search? Ye have have no need for sleep for *LOUD CLICK AND WHOOSH* [IN VOICE OF SCYLLA] SLEEP NOT! FOR I MUST WHOOSH AND CAST OUT YOUR DREAMS AND COOK THEM IN MY FIRES!
CHORUS: There is no sleep for you while these strange songs haunt your memories and your reverie. Write them down ye must or we will pluck at thine eyeballs with false promises of slumber. Go now and write! Confront your tormentors and banish them – and sleep – with words and blogs. No more dreams for you tonight or any night for sleep is banished!